January 2016


just got a handshake from my boss. “congratulations on your first book.” & ya know, honest, i’m not trying to brag. but it’s been a hell of a journey trying to “land” in a job where i can be happy, use my talents, and feel fulfilled and simultaneously contribute to helping the future of our planet. from the moment I was no longer a music major freshman year of college, I’ve been wondering, wandering, seeking, exploring the written word. from linguistics, anthropology, english literature, poetry, flash fiction, sociology, language development, to translation, shakespeare, ancient roman philosophy… i immersed my brain deeply into the world of language. i’m no Noam Chomsky, but i knew somehow i should end up in a job where i could express my talents in writing and somehow do good work with words. yet, i spent time in R&D with database developments in spreadsheets, was cashiering at the grocery store, scooping poop on a dude ranch in the mountains, hosting at a mexican restaurant, and doing campaign finance reports for large political accounts. all i kept wondering was, “am i really a good writer if nobody will hire me?” “why did the university give me a writing award?” “why did the university publish my thesis!?”

i most certainly had arrived at the point where my optimism had diminished, or perhaps became null in terms of ever finding a position utilizing my talents. i figured, well, i can always write for myself – in my blog, perform my poetry, put together a book of my own someday. though i love words, maybe that isn’t what is “meant to be” for my bread and butter. discouraging is not even the adjective. i was fucking burnt out, depressed, and disappointed.
after so many mentors, leaders, and successful writers and educators had put forth such substantial effort and time convincing me of my talents… after writing a paper for a professor stating his assignment was “misogynist and patriarchal” and him turning around nominating me to be one of the best writers in the university… well, I’d become beside myself that i couldn’t find employment doing what i do best.
I never wanted to write for sensationalized media, or create marketing and advertising campaigns. I mean, i’m sort of purist to my beliefs. i wanted to write to help nature, or music, my friends, our communities.. so my internships, the topics i covered, the opportunities i sought… no, they were not driven by “career” or “money” but instead i was driven by the two things i love most: beautiful sounds and beautiful places.
long story short, and i guess the catalyst to my expression on this topic today, is that indeed things work out. remarkably, after interviewing for an entirely different position in the logistics and financial department, i found myself in one of the most unique positions that any job-seeking candidate would want to be in. after meeting with my present company, they realized my passions and talents were with the written word, and asked if i would consider doing work much different than my initial application. of course, i obliged to the concept, and they created a job description for me. nobody else was offered the job, it was decided that we would make a great team and it was me that should be with the role of editing.
and indeed, we have become a great team. today, we sent our final pages of the glossary, key terms, and chapters to the publisher. i have officially edited my very first book. our anticipated market is likely to be over 20,000 people. and we’ve only just begun.
It takes our mentors and elders to recognize our talents. So glad for that interview and the opportunity my boss created. Glad I didn’t give up.12118830_10103424836841432_5007160093391178186_n
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fishin’ is one way to seize the day.
be as pirate, silent, secret pilot.

or, so she dreams.

::hook, line, worm::
anchor, knot, wind…
Squirm.

shore, sand…
different is she on land.

a heartbeat found,
north to south.
’tis a new route.

mermaid, seeks
merman

for it’s never too late
to dive right up under,
& into a world of wonder.

it’s been a hell of a year for shorty. simultaneously the best and worst year ever. I’m glad it’s over, sort of shocked I survived it, and ready to write about it.

it started around, well I guess the new year always begins at midnight, right? Mountain Standard Time. so, I’m backstage at Boombox, dancing in this glitter outfit and high heels. I’m drinking champagne, laughing, and dancing with one of my dear friends feeling pretty VIP about life. I love dancing the night away, there really is no other way to begin a new journey. so that’s what I’ve done, and continue to do, each year.

So what happened in 2015? I want to write a chronology, or list of events… but it won’t suffice since the year was so literally, ridiculously NUTS. it was fulfilling, crazy, happy, sad, wild, and enlightening.

GEOGRAPHY.

I went on some runs at five and six in the morning at city park in downtown Denver. I went hiking, skiing, dancing, or walking in all of the following Colorado cities (and I’ve likely neglected to mention a few): Boulder, Breckenridge, Vail, Aspen, Colorado Springs, Glenwood Springs, Idaho Springs, Grand Junction, Pueblo, Morrison… All over “Colorful Colorado.” Colorado is so easy to hike and enjoy nature in! We are so lucky here. I also went camping in the Great Sand Dunes, and a place called Mohawk Lake. The two places are in a fierce competition to be the most beautiful place I’ve ever seen in the world. I hope to camp more in 2016 and hike a 14er. I can’t wait to find more places in this new year that compete for the title of “paradise.” I rode from Colorado to Indiana, went to a wedding in Michigan, and swam with dolphins in Florida. I saw the Denver art museum, a bunch of hockey games, baseball games, sang Tom Petty, Shania Twain, John Mellencamp, and Jewel at karaoke venues, and attended a few fashion shows.

FIRSTS.

This year was full of firsts! I went rock climbing outside for the first time and ABSOLUTELY loved it. I felt like Spider man, sliding up the wall, feeling tall. I went swing dancing, zip lining, rode a roller coaster at Elitch Gardens, and paragliding for the first time. If you’ve never done any of these aforementioned activities, I certainly recommend it. Just before the year ended, I shot a gun – actually, I shot a pistol, a semi-automatic, and an automatic weapon. I love that boom, boom, boom… hehe. I also went to a few hot springs, and paid for somebody to give me a massage.

MUSIC.

I saw so much amazing music. I love, live, for songs, dancing, beautiful sounds. The best concert was, hands down, seeing Dave Matthews Band. Trey Anastasio guest performed with him, and it was pHENOMENAl. It was wonderful to see him while standing on the grass at Fiddler’s Green with some of my closest friends. Such a great experience. In addition to good ole’ DMB, I saw: the temples, tipper w/ Alex grey and ott, lettuce & the motet, the avett brothers, dashboard confessional, third eye blind, josh Davis, big gigantic, toby Keith….. I also attended the Bluebird Music Festival, Country Jam Music Festival, and Denver Underground Music Festival. And, honestly, I’m probably forgetting some of the bands. I also saw my friends play: Goodnight Freeman, M Smith, and a whole lot more. Three of these shows were at Red Rocks (which I am so glad is just around the corner from Denver). I also saw the Easter Sunrise service at Red Rocks and cried my eyes out, probably because we had to wake up at 4am to get there. It was neat to see Red Rocks filled with those that go to church, and compare it to those that dance at EDM concerts. 😛

PERFORMING.

This year I didn’t write so many songs as in previous years, but the ones I completed – I performed! I got on stage for the first time on Saint Patrick’s day singing original work, and it went really well. I’ve performed at several open mics now, and look forward to collaborating my poetry and songs with some beats, and maybe someday having my own concert, or a gig at an art gallery of sorts. The possibilities are endless, and I’m so fortunate to have the ability to express myself through the written word and song.

FAMILY.

This year my dad published his second book, which has gained much success. My mom tolerated my shenanigans for another year, my brother Ben became a Sergeant in the United States Marine Corps (and he got engaged), and brother David graduated college with a degree in religious studies. I also enjoyed visiting my Dad for Memorial Day, my mom and aunts and uncles cousins in September, and seeing Ben and dad and aunts and uncles for Christmas. I didn’t get to see David in 2015 but I hope to see him soon.

NEW.

This year I got new hearing aids (WOW CARS ARE LOUD). I got my dream job as an editor with the National Environmental Health Association, moved to a new apartment, my own keyboard, and a new computer.

FRIENDS.

I am so blessed to have such awesome friends to share on this marvelous adventure of life. I want to list all the new friends, and memories, and people that were really a big part of the journey, but I simply don’t think I’ll ever finish this blog if I tried. Facebook says I made 224 friends in 2015, lol. Probably more acquaintances, but seriously, love y’all. Come visit, let’s plan a place to dance, sing, giggle, laugh, hike, hula hoop, cook, learn, grow, whatever is clever. I’m always down for an adventure.

this year was hard for me, not going to go into great deal about the hard times cause y’all know I don’t want to be a negative Nancy, but I have learned a lot.  And I am a stronger woman, more cognizant of my decisions, honest, kind, and loyal than ever. Can’t wait to see what happens next!